Travel Blog – 17th May 2023

Flashback: Back in 2020, we were supposed to come to Sicily and had to cancel due to Covid. On that trip, we had booked a private boat trip from the island of Lipari to the island of Stromboli, which is an active volcano that erupts every 15 to 20 minutes. The cruise was to start at 2:00pm and return at 10:00pm, allowing us to see the eruption at night, the best time to view it. We re-booked the cruise for this trip, but didn’t tell Ian and Carmel about it so that it would be a surprise for them.

Two days before the cruise was to take place, while about to leave Palermo for Cefalu, we received a message from the cruise company. It seemed that the weather on the Saturday was going to be terrible and the captain had pulled the pin. The only thing they could do was to reschedule on the Friday, ie: tomorrow. We were to spend the night in Cefalu that night and it was then a 2 hour drive to Milazzo to catch the 1 hour ferry to Lipari where the cruise departed. It was going to be a rush, but we bit the bullet and agreed to go on the Friday.

We spent the Thursday night in Cefalu, then had to leave at 7:00am in order to give us plenty of time to get to Milazzo. We booked the 10:30 ferry from Milazzo to Lipari and the carpark in Milazzo to leave the car for the three days. We got to the carpark without a hitch and made it to the ferry terminal with plenty of time to spare. The ferry left half an hour late, but we still arrived in Lipari at 12:00 with loads of time to spare.

After checking into our hotel and grabbing some lunch, we headed to the port to catch our cruise. Giacomo was waiting for us and his boat, Vossia, was lovely. We boarded and took off from Lipari. The weather was perfect, the ocean smooth and the views of Lipari from the water stunning. Churches and houses dotted throughout the green, mountainous terrain, with dramatic cliff faces plunging down to the ocean.

Our first stop was the island of Panarea. We disembarked and enjoyed a granita on Giacomo’s recommendation. I went for pistachio, Carmel had a mojito flavour and Ian and Lidia tried the lemon and ginger. The ginger was so strong that it hit you right in the back of the throat.

Panarea was lovely. All of the buildings are painted white with blue doors and shutters, much like a Greek island.

After boarding the Vossia once again, we headed to the island of Stromboli, the volcano herself. We couldn’t believe that there are actually two villages on the slopes of the volcano. Talk about living on the edge! We stopped at one of the villages and disembarked. The sand was black and warm and we all went straight to the beach.

Ian decided that he wanted to go for a swim, but didn’t want to get his undies wet. There is a Mr. Bean episode where he takes his underpants off without removing his pants and Ian took this as inspiration to do the same. His technique was flawed from the start, attempting to drag both legs of his reg grundies down at the same time. This only resulted in the crotch of his underderps stretching way down, catching on the crotch of his shorts and dragging them down so that all of the boats floating past got a great look at his lily-white arse-cheeks. He was hanging onto those jocks for all money, and I’m sure I saw a bead of sweat appear on his forehead as he contemplated the consequences of letting go, the highly elasticised y-fronts potentially shooting up and sling-shotting into his testicles with such force they could possibly drop out of his nostrils. Fortunately for him and us spectators alike, that didn’t happen and the worst we saw was a pale moon rising. Eventually, he figured out that the best technique was to drag one leg of his jockarellas down over his foot and then pop the entire garment out of the other leg of his shorts. Success!

Then it was back on board just as the sun started to descend. We first took a look at some fumaroles, which are subterranean geysers that spew hot air into the ocean, causing the surface to boil. The smell of sulphur was strong.

We then circumnavigated Stromboli island to the side where the lava flows. We didn’t know where to look: the sun was setting on one side of the boat and Stromboli was exploding at regular intervals on the other. We sat for a long time, motionless save for the constant swell of the ocean rising and falling gently. We had only seen a lot of glowing coming from the great mountain until suddenly, with a huge BOOM, she erupted with a massive column of flame. We managed some great photos and as Giacomo steered our boat back toward Lipari, she kept erupting every few minutes. It was incredible to see.

As the captain accelerated away from Stromboli, we looked at Ian sitting with his hand on the handle of the toilet, looking very green around the gills. He suddenly reefed the door open and entered the toilet, staying there for quite some time. It seems the constant swell had done a number on him and he purged his dinner, doing the technicolour yawn. After about half an hour, having emptied his carrot gland, he felt a little better, although I’m sure he was counting every second of the one hour trip back to Lipari.

The next day, we spent the day wandering around the island of Lipari. The girls found plenty of shopping to keep them amused, while Ian and I wandered around the archaeological museum, and enjoyed  an ancient amphitheatre and the views across the coast. Ian and I saw a seagull the size of a small car standing on a wall overlooking the coastline and decided it would make a good photo if he scared it off and I could take a well-timed pic in mid-flight. He walked right up to the seagull, but it obviously looked him up and down, decided it could take him if necessary and didn’t even bother to fly away.

We then headed back to the girls, stopping for a coffee and hazelnut gelati along the way.

On our final full day in the Aeolian islands, we took a ferry over to the island of Salina. This place is famous for growing capers and we had a delicious Italian lunch at a Michelin restaurant, which featured capers in every dish.

The tiny main street was chock full of shops and cats. There were felines walking around everywhere, even sleeping in the shop windows.

We then wandered 3 kilometres along the coastal road to a tiny beach. The road was a lot like the Great Ocean Road with cacti. Once we got there, there wasn’t a lot to see, so we took the bus back to the port to take our ferry back to Lipari.

Useless story time: The door to our bathroom swung out and almost touched the basin. That meant that you had to open the door way wide to get into the toilet so you could clear the sink. Unfortunately, the last foot of door swing caused the hinges to grab, emitting a long-winded SQUEEEEEEEEEEEAK. This was OK during the day, but at night it was sure to wake your bedtime buddy. I tried opening the door really quickly, so as not to disturb Lidia’s slumber, but this just resulted in a shorter, louder SQUICK!!!!!! Not to be outsmarted by a door, I devised a strategy. At 3:00am I decided to foil the door’s evil plan by opening it a fraction, leaving a small gap between the door and the basin, sneak into the gap, then close the door. This would ensure that the door would not open all the way, thereby avoiding the squeaky section of the hinge. It was tricky, but I figured it could be done with stealth and cunning. I opened the door a fraction. So far, so good. I snuck into the small gap. Unfortunately, I forgot about the metal bin in the corner next to the sink and kicked it into the tiled wall of the bathroom, making a sound like a bull in a saucepan shop. The only positive: The hinge didn’t squeak. I went back to bed and Lidia muttered “What are you doing?” This proves that I’m smarter than a door, but not quite as smart as a garbage can.